The Pope Admits the Truth

01/06/2014

So the Pope is finally telling everyone the truth.  The problem is that, like the little boy who cried wolf, some people don’t seem to believe him.

The latest is the story that the Pope believes that Hell does not exist and that the story of Adam and Eve is a fable! As far as I can tell, this story is not true but could easily have been, as the Pope has previously warned Christians that they will eventually need to reevaluate their faith and come to a new understanding of the Bible.

So what exactly does the Pope believe in? Let’s try and break it down.  Based on recent public statements made by the Pope and the Vatican, I think that it’s fair to conclude that:

  • God has already saved Man. Aside – I guess we can dispense with the concepts of Sin and Salvation then.
  • The Bible is not the Word of God.
  • It’s okay to take money from the poor to build a billion-dollar telescope for the Church.
  • Extraterrestrials are real.  Aside – the Pope would even like to do confessions for them.

Connecting the dots, one could easily come to the conclusion that the Pope is angling to be the leader of a new world religion, a religion which venerates and worships extraterrestrials.  Maybe that’s why the Vatican named their expensive new telescope Lucifer.  Perhaps they are expecting his return.

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4 Responses to “The Pope Admits the Truth”

  1. Good satire. I especially liked the aliens bit.

  2. Darrell Barnett said

    Hey John, this is all very interesting isn’t it? Keep on putting out the good columns!

  3. Arkenaten said

    Many a true word said in jest!

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